Wednesday, November 19, 2008

The taste in my mouth

I hate to admit it. It's really hard for me. I do hold a grudge, even though I know it's better for me, for my spirit if I don't. I try to let go. I tell myself to bless them and let it go. It is really hard for me but one of the major lessons I am going to HAVE to learn or things will never change.

I have to change my mind. I have to change my heart.

If I hang onto bad feelings, especially around my show, they will show up somehow. I cannot afford them to continue and possibly effect the next round. I achieved my dream- but I was too exhausted to enjoy it. To tired to keep pushing and get it just the way I wanted. I did not get the ending done to my satisfaction. I need to re-mount somehow but I really need help this time to pull it off. I don't think I have that much in me to do it again if I don't have some serious backers and helpers.

The idea is wonderful. The impact is huge! The toll it took was enormous.

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